


A Friendly Visit

by AdorabloodthirstyKitty



Category: Deadpool - All Media Types
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-17
Updated: 2016-02-17
Packaged: 2018-05-21 05:36:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6040228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AdorabloodthirstyKitty/pseuds/AdorabloodthirstyKitty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Avengers are interrupted.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Friendly Visit

**Author's Note:**

> based on this post:  
> http://ebind.tumblr.com/post/119246355079/i-really-want-deadpool-to-show-up-with-the

"We've noticed suspicious activity in a few countries. Russia, Peru, Mexico, the US," Fury lists, different spots popping up across the board of the areas in question. "We'll need a couple of each of you to split up into small groups, gather information, and take out your targets."

The room is silent, the heroes surveying the map, before a couple loud beeps ring across the room, catching the attention of the Avengers. The heroes and other members of S.H.I.E.L.D turn toward the source of the noise.

Deadpool stands at the counter near the microwave, leaning back with hands resting on the counter as he watches the meeting. He gives a wave as he becomes the center of attention, the microwave dinging loudly in the sudden quiet.

He turns to pull his chimichangas out of the microwave, pulling his mask up over his nose as he digs in, looking back toward the heroes again. Stark is the first to speak up, dark eyebrow high. "What the hell are you doing here?"

Wade raises a finger, still chewing a large mouthful of meat and rice before speaking around the rest of the food still in his mouth.

"Thought I'd stop by, say hi to my favorite supergroup. Well, besides NSYNC. Plus Batman doesn't like me using his kitchen," he shrugs, taking another large bite.

"Why not use your own microwave?" Natasha asks, the red-clad mercenary hopping backwards onto the counter, swinging his legs as he eats.

"I wouldn't be able to annoy Fury if I stayed home," he points out, Fury glowering at him from across the room but otherwise silent. The room lapses back in silence, Deadpool's chewing the only sound for a few seconds before Fury goes back to briefing the heroes on the situation, everyone collectively ignoring the intruder still eating in the kitchen.

The heroes have almost completely forgotten about Deadpool before a rummaging catches their attention, a couple Avengers turning to see the mercenary searching through the fridge, finally pulling out a bottle of salsa and pouring a decent amount over both burritoes. Fury sighs, his most intimidating  glare directed at the intruder as he finishes his food.

"If you're finished, some of us have shit to do."

Wade looks up, studying Fury momentarily before coming to the conclusion that getting the fuck out of there might be a good idea. Without much thought he runs for the nearest open window, hopping onto the counter and out, immediately in freefall toward the streets and sidewalk hundreds of feet below.

"SPIDEY CATCH ME," he yells over the wind, somewhat surprised when he hits the ground moments later with a splat.

"What the shit Parker!?" he screams, blood and bones all over the place. An elderly woman stares from a few feet away, his blood splattered across her dress.

"Sorry, that shit's gonna stain," he calls over to her, sitting up as best he can. She continues staring in horror a few seconds longer before shuffling away as quickly as she can, leaving Wade to wait until he can pull himself up and walk his ass back home.


End file.
